I came of age right before the internet exploded. Oh, sure: I did some chatting when that was the thing. But the reality is, I never felt like I really connected with those people. They couldn't see me and vice-verse. We could be bits and pieces of ourselves, and feel "safe" doing so. I remember when internet dating started and all the awkwardness I heard from others who participated in it (I declined to participate in that particular piece of culture...). It was like people knew they were about to be "truly exposed."
Sure, some people may find a sense of community--people who are into unique things or that have a small niche. For example, I remember watching a documentary on Primordial Dwarfism--a very small subset of dwarfism with a short lifespan and a lot of complications. I think a place like the internet is a godsend for these people. How else could they otherwise meet, find a sense of belonging and sympathy and understanding?
However, for the average person, I think it is too easy to hide away on the internet--to substitute virtual reality for living. I want to be outside experiencing life. The internet is, to me, just a tool to help me find those experiences (and sometimes things I need). I have an email and Facebook account--but, as you all know, my friends on Facebook are real people I know and interact with in real life on a semi-regular basis. It is a way to simply keep it touch with those I might otherwise have less contact with: internet as tool. When people use it as a lifeline, I have great concern.
Maybe I am becoming an "old fart," set in my ways: "Why, when I was your age, we didn't have any of that interwebs stuff..." Yet I see more and more people--even of my own age--who are constantly connected to the web. They use it for everything: dating, friendship, communication, school, entertainment, etc. etc. etc. ad nauseum. They seem to lack social skills and graces--only knowing netiquette--and sometimes not even that. Then again...
I also tend to shy away from online communication. Most of the people that I communicate with online are people I know in real life. Even though I might be tagging them in posts on my Facebook, usually that means they're in the same room as me. I'd much rather pull out my phone and call or text them than chat online.
ReplyDeleteHi Andrea,
ReplyDeleteI love that video! I think there is balance to be struck in our online communication. One of the things I like about Facebook, email and other online communication tools is that they are asynchronous. I don't have to monitor them or be available to them except at times I choose.
I think of days of old when travel was difficult and people corresponded by writing letters. People often went for years without seeing a loved one, but stayed connected by sending these pieces of paper. Think of the current ability to actually see and hear one's loved one in real time - even from across the globe!
As far as meeting new people online, Perhaps it is easier to be trivial and/or disingenuous in this easy online frontier, but a choice can be made to be genuine and thoughtful in one's communication - whatever the medium.
That said, I too often choose not to engage with unknown online others, especially when I have not context for them and they seem content to repeat cliches and celebrate the trivial. My 2 cents.